Author
I have an eeeebil plan.
Step 1*
That trick never works.
We’ll never know if we don’t try it. Bwah-ha-ha!
Yeah, good luck with that.
I kind of liked it.
Oooh, just tried to do the math. Bored now.
Told yah. Group nap!
*Thanks to Matt Kuchta for the kitty art
I are a kitty!
The deuce you say. You’re clearly art of the pronounced ahht sort.
I never understand what going on around here…
What’s going around is ahhht, obviously.
Also Simon Smith and his amazing dancing bear!
Da hell?
I don’t know wake me up when this post starts making sense.
Or if we get to Pittsburgh. You always want to wake up for that.
Riiiiiight. They really don’t pay me enough for this shit.
Do you know what I want for Catmas?*
This?
Not bad, but no.
Do you know what I want?
A pterodactyl?
I’m guessing it’s more like FREEDOM!
From the monkey holding your paws, that is.
Yeah. Ahh, better.
Not a pterodactyl? Cats are super weird. I’m outta here.
*With thanks to Matt Kuchta for the art.
I am the ghost of lamppost future.
…the hell?
What part of lamppost future don’t you understand?
All of it?
Allow me to read to you from the book of lamppost…
Um, how about no?
The killer whale of non sequiturs agrees with you.
If there’s one thing Cthulhu knows it’s evil, and that whale? EEEvil!
I am dubious about this proposition. Also, too tired to hold head up.
Dubious snow ninja is agrees.
I am sooooo confused.
This thing isn’t giving off fumes, is it?
My eyes are feeling a little skrudgy.
Dude! Also, what are you doing in a cat blog?
Hey now, lets not be speciesist.
Can we be nappist? I like naps.
Can we talk about my eyes? They’re starting to feel really weird…
Weren’t you in an Indiana Jones movie?
Naps, man, we need to talk naps!
I’m kind of unimpressed with your focus here…
That’s beneath you, and so am I.
All is right with the world.
Perfect sunny afternoon.
Yeah, man, sniff the glove.
Uh, wait, what now?
Pretty sure she “said sniff the glove…”
The glove is magic! Do not defy the glove!
I so don’t understand cats.
I was thinking we could try something different this time, a dialogue.
Meow?
You know, a back and forth between the two of us.
I am a cat.
Am I getting through to you at all?
I like cat food.
Facepaw.
Cats, man…
We are kittens and cuter than you are.
Not listening.
Cute, maybe. Also easily devoured.
This is what it looks like after you devour a pair of kittens.
I can’t believe we’re having this conversation. Kitten waste space.
Sandals, why did it have to be sandals?
Could be worse, could be leezards.
But everybody loves leezards! Especially cute little geckos.
I scratch my ear at you leezard, I scratch my ear at you.
Monkey, why is there glass between us?
Glass tastes icky!
You call this a theme, Monkey?
Seriously not your best effort, Monkey.
FEETS OF STRENGTH!
