*Shaking head* Dragon said through a mouthful of drool. This won’t end well.
Rainy day. Napping. Sent dragon for fishes. Very useful pet, though I wish dragon would stop trying to groom me. Knight-breath is gross.
So I say to the dragon, “You’ve been chasing unicorns again.” D says, “Have not.” I say, “Then why the dried rainbow on your snout?” D says, “…”
Purple sparklys and woozy? Sigh. Lie down, and next time try to remember that inhaling is an important part of talking, ya big dummy.
What makes a noise like 6 armored knights on a giant hamster wheel? A snoring dragon on a metallic hoard. Dragon + nap + sparklys = OMG!
Dragon brought home a knight’s horse and is now using fire breath to melt gold into a horn mold he dug in the cave floor and mumbling about presentation. Sigh.
Package arrived today—ACME fairy unicorn princess dress, size extra small. Wrapped it in bacon and let dragon ated it. Heh.
Am seeing a world of possibilities in Dragon becoming a local politician. Eat the right folk and we can rule the forest! Bwa-ha-ha! Steel claws in a velvet paw anyone?
Teaching dragon benefits of napping. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
My pet dragon just bought a leather biker jacket. Soooo cute. Am thinking of using it to make a couch.
Thinking I need a better pet. There I am having a little quiet me time in the litterbox when my big stupid lizard sneezes fire everywhere. It sounded like a flock of exploding geese. Still fluffy. Stupid lizard.
Twas the night before catmas and all through the wood
My pet dragon was a-stalking and up to no good
Hunting that stupid old unicorn and plotting its end
He had him a plan did my big lizard friend…
But the pointy-face horse is a wily old beast
And dragon is headed for famine not feast
Sneaky and snooty, with skin like thick leather
It sparkles so white, and hides in the weather
I’d just settled my bones for a long winter’s nap
still very much missing one silly dragon’s lap
When out in the woods there arose such a clatter
That I nearly rose to see what was the matter
Got my pet dragon a mirror, so next time the bloody great lizard wants to complain about Cthulhumas with the relatives, it can talk to someone who cares.
I’ll Update When I’m Damned Good And Ready