Kelly McCullough writes fantasy, science fiction, and books for kids of varying ages. He lives in Wisconsin with his physics professor wife and a small herd of cats. His novels include the WebMage and Fallen Blade series — Penguin/ACE, and the forthcoming School for Sidekicks — Feiwel and Friends/Macmillan. His short fiction has appeared in numerous magazines and anthologies. He also dabbles in science fiction as science education with The Chronicles of the Wandering Star — part of an NSF-funded science curriculum — and the science comic Hanny & the Mystery of the Voorwerp, which he co-authored and co-edited — funding provided by NASA and the Hubble Space Telescope. Kelly on Twitter, Facebook, G+, ello
I’m ready for my turkey!
I too am ready for turkey. GIVE ME TURKEY
I AM NOT A TURKEY
Not funny thumb-monkey. I want a REAL turkey.
Don’t make me hurt you. Just hand over the bird.
TURKEY TURKEY TURKEY
Who needs turkey when you’ve got slippers and straight tryptophan.
Still prefer my tryptophan in turkey format. Food coma in 3.2.zzzzzzzzz
Hey, thumb-monkey, I told you not to publish that pic. Have a different bird!
I climbed Mount Monkey!
Dude, that’s an awful lot of work…
I climbed Mount Cat Bed…
That is NOT an achievement.
The base of Mount Monkey smells kinda funky…
What kind of moron smells a monkey?
I prefer to use my glasses to perceive them from afar!
Speaking of monkeys, do you have a good ape insurance policy?
Back off man, I’m woodpecker!
November 16, 2016 in Writing
Forget write what you know, write what you love. Find the things that make you WANT to write and cling to them like a life line. You will never succeed writing things that you hate. You may not succeed writing what you love either, but you will have spent time on a thing that matters to you and that’s always worthwhile.
It’s almost Halloween. Time for my famous zombie impression!
No zombiezzzzz, make them go way with crossed paws!
That’s vampires you nincompoop!
There’s a difference?
It is a head scratcher.
So which ones come in pods?
None of them! That’s birds! And they’re called eggs!
Oh, good, I can sleep easy then. Birds are delicious.
Do you see what I see?
Yeah, holy shit.
Why didn’t anybody tell me birds came in size hammer drill?
Have you seen my monkey? I can’t find him anywhere.*
No monkeys here, but the feather toy is all MINE!
This is not my monkey. Is he down there?
Monkeys are overrated.
Yes, naps are better than monkeys any day.
I has a monkey, and he loves me.
I would also like to have a monkey, but he is out of reach!
Where oh where is my monkey? Is he hiding under this shirt?
Oh well. If you find my monkey, please tell him to come give me pets.
*With thanks to Matt Kuchta, Mandy Little, and Neil Gaiman for guest kitties.
I don’t often post political things here on my blog because this webpage is primarily about the author side of my life even though I am also an elected county supervisor here in Wisconsin, or what most people think of as a county commissioner. This is one of the rare times where I’m going to go ahead and violate that soft rule and put on my politician hat for a few moments and make a couple of public endorsements.
First and foremost, I’m going to endorse Hillary Clinton for the office of president. I’m doing this both because I believe that she will make an excellent president and because I believe Donald Trump represents a genuine threat to American Democracy and that this election is a defining ethical moment for American voters.
On the one hand we can vote Hillary Clinton, an incredibly smart and capable woman who has dedicated her life to public service. She is a hard worker, a deep thinker about policy, and a tireless advocate for the most vulnerable among us. She has made mistakes, but I know of no human being who hasn’t and I strongly believe that she has learned from hers and used them as a spur to drive herself to do better the next time.
On the other hand we have Donald Trump, a man who has spent his lifetime building monuments to his ego, and who has built a campaign on feeding the worst impulses in the American character. From day one hatred, racism, bigotry, xenophobia, and misogyny have formed the underpinnings of his pitch to the American people and he has doubled down on those themes at every step of the way. The revelations of October are no surprise to those who have actually been paying attention to what he has said. This is who Donald Trump is, a narcissistic egotist who would cheerfully burn the world down if he thought it might warm his hands.
The choice between the two is very clear, and it my sincere hope that we will soon have the opportunity to address Hillary Clinton as Madam President.
I am also going to endorse Russ Feingold for Senator of my own state of Wisconsin. Again I have a number of reasons for doing this. Number one, I believe that we need to send Hillary Clinton to the White House with a firm majority in both the house and senate.
We have seen what a Republican majority looks like in both of those bodies under the current political climate, and it is a never-ending string of opposition for opposition’s sake. The current Republican party has decided that its own political fortunes are more important than the health and well-being of the country, and they must lose and lose badly if they are ever to have any chance of returning to being a responsible political party who advances the country’s interests over their own.
I do not say this lightly or with any happiness. I believe that it is important to have a sane and responsible conservative party to keep those of us on the liberal side of things sharp and honest. Sadly, that party does not currently exist, and our current Senator Ron Johnson is a perfect example of the worst of today’s obstructionist Republican party. He needs to be retired.
So I am happy to endorse Russ Feingold, who has served in the Senate before under both Republican and Democratic presidents with honor and distinction. I don’t agree with every decision he has made, and some of them have irritated me deeply, but I believe that he has always made his choices based on what he believes is best for the country and best for Wisconsin.