Monday Meows

Fell asleep reaching for mah phone.

I think you might have a problem, my dude.

Yeah, he thinks his pan is half full, but actually…

That’s a really weird metaphor, my friend.

It really is.

He’s going to be pissed when he wakes up and finds THE PHONE IS MINE.

 

Monday Meows

I’m dreaming of my blankie…Eileen.

I think I begin to see why…

You stay away from Eileen!

Holy shit, dudes, it’s just a blanket.

I like pigs.

Weirdos.

I’m more of a towel man, myself…

Monday Meows

Bird bird bird, bird is the word…

The delicious delicious word.

I must be dreaming.

No, pretty sure I can reach it from here.

Oooh, I wanna watch this…

Ptery vs. Tortie, sure, why not, beats pay per view.

Monday Meows

Jeeves, you must go to the Dagobah system…

Hokay, I’m in, what’s a Baglebah?

Not the hero we were looking for.

I keep trying to change the channel, but it never works.

Gonna wash that cat right outta my hair, gonna wash that cat…

Monday Meows

It’s more comfortable than it looks…

I sure hope so.

So is this. Comfortable, I mean.

How is he even doing that?

What did I do in a previous life to saddle me with four brothers?

Monday Meows

When shall we three meet again?

I vote for when hell freezes over.

Oooh, yeah, seconded!

I can work with that.

I have never in my whole life been happier not to be invited to a party.

INORITE?!

Monday Meows

I’ve been playing a lot of Halo lately.

I don’t think that’s quite the same, my dude.

Shhh, if he figures out electronics he’ll want his own phone next.

I gets it. See dis my zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzoom meeting.

Guys, being the dimmest bulb on the tree is my gig. Lay off.

Monday Meows

Paws for thought?

Toes are my pawses. Shove off.

Ooh, he’s deep.

Hip deep, maybe.

Laugh track in 3.2.1…

Is that a paws make tracks joke? Because, if so, I quit.

 

Monday Meows

I’m doing hard time here.

I’ll play you a lament if I can pick up the world’s smallest violin here.

I understood that reference!

Russian Judge (Red Guardian) gives your joke three of four paws down.

I’m in hell. I’m literally in hell.

Monday Meows

I’m auditioning to be library lion!

Lion? You? Srsly?

No, I think he’s got this.

The only lion he’ll ever be is lyin’ around.