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Give in to your hatred, Luke.
How many times do we have to tell you you’re not Darth Vader?
How can anyone care about that movie anymore when there’s a new chair on the porch?
Couch over porch any day. The toes know, the toes know.
The toes know? Is that like a zen thing?
No, but I am a Zen thing. The Zen of behind the radiator.
Go way! Dreaming.
Dreaming of things she put on the shopping list perhaps?*
I is dreaming of the existential horror of being devoured by my own toes.
You are one strange neurotic little cat…
I’z dreaming of being a giant panther!
Good luck with that…
I am dreaming of the taste of your soul.
Bonus friday cat doggerel written about our late and much loved Spot.
Why?
Because: A) “cat doggerel” is fun to say. B) I found it in the glove compartment
I
*Shopping list art actually by Matt Kuchta—who left it there when we weren’t looking.
What the hell is that white stuff coming from the sky? It can’t be snow, it’s May!
Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Wait, what now? That can’t be right.
There is no snow on the couch. There is no snow on the couch.
There is no snow on the couch…….
Ima sleep here and be cute till it goes away. ‘kay?
Jus’ having a little confab with Mr Toilet brush. I whiskey there was shnow. Hic.
At last my eebul plans come to fruition. FimbulWinter is begun. I can reveal my true…
Wait, I’ve just been informed I’m not Loki God of Eebul. Damn. Wake me for summer.
Not so sure about this new tower style litter box…
Argh! That which has been seen cannot be unseen. Grosssssss!
We’re judging you for your litter box humor.
Look over there, a ctulhu-yeti!
Wait, what the hell was that?
Dude, have you ever really looked at a cobweb, because, like, whoooah!
Things are really strange at Chez McCullough…
Yes, yes, they are.
LASER treat tracking systems emgaged.
There were treats and nobody woke me?
You snooze, you no gets treats. Sorry. Iz because rulez.
Did someone say zomezing aboutzzz…oh, never mindzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzz
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
I have nothing but disdain for your petty cute picture taking ways, thumb-monkey.
What the heck? Someone said treats. Then there were naps, and now no treats. Confuzed.
I am not a cat, more like a very small dragon, but I too like treats….
Dragon? Hmph, I eat dragons for breakfast.
This cat bed is too big!
This cat bed is too small.
This cat bed is just right. But the catering service leaves something to be desired.
Bring me a cat bed thumb-monkey!
Who needs a cat bed when you can haz sweater?
Cats have beds, we goddesses have our own chairs.
Despite appearances, this is a picture of cats hatching diabolical schemes
I’ve never hatched a diabolical scheme in my life.
She’s lying, you know.
I dream dreams of eeeeeevil!
Mmmmm, eeeeevil dreaming.
My diabolical schemes are totally better than theirs!
Amateurs, all of you, amateurs.
Not sure what my thumbmonkey sees in this thing. No purrs. No furs. No fun.
I know, I know…wait, can someone help me untie my feets?
That which has been seen cannot be unseen. Not even yoga cat gone wrong.
I can’t find the off ramp from dis thumbmonkey! Keep having to circle its head.
We are not amused, but we are picturesque.
I’m getting too old for this shit, someone wake me when it’s time for my closeup.
Look, I is sphinx! Is like cat right? You blog me now?
They called me insane. Insane!
Might be a reason for that. Just sayin’…
Bored by this discussion. Move on.
Me toozzzzzzzzzz…
I don’t know why you all keep yammering when this damn mouse won’t die!
Speaking of insane…
I will destroy you all when my plot comes to fruition!
You live with her and you called my mousie thing crazy?
Hey, look what I can do!
Sexay! We can haz Kitty Dance Party!
Kitty Dance Party!
Gross! Did you see that?
I am fresh out of rips to give.
Hey the McCullough cats are having all the fun. We should have Kitty Dance Party too!
Like this: Kitty Dance Party!
You touched my tail. Now you must die.
I are not a cat and haz no dance party, but I haz a ducky, and a zzz, and wanted to share.
